Overheard

“Okay don’t order too much because I’m paying for our food.”

Isnt this phrase, like, taboo or something? Like even if you really do mean it and even if you really are thinking it you just keep your fat lips pursed?

If my friend said that to me I think I’d faint. I’d either faint or yell, “Nigga I eat what I wont!” and order the whole menu because I’m a bauce and then pay with my own money because I’m a bauce and also because I’m an independent woman - ladies put your hands up if the shoes you’re wearing (you bought it), the house you live in (your parents still own). What?